While Christmas can be a fun time, it can also be the most stressful time of the year. Shopping, baking, a multitude of Christmas parties and luncheons and one or more Christmas dinners can be overwhelming. Throw in a regular job, housecleaning and children and you and your spouse could end up hating each other by the 26th of December. But there are a few things that you can do this holiday season to make sure that you have a good time and that your marriage survives the stress of the holidays.
Shop early and shop smart
Depending on how many people are on your list, shopping for Christmas can the most stressful part of the holidays. The stores are crazy the month of December with everybody scrambling to get the perfect gift for all of their family members and friends. Instead of joining in the insanity, shop early. Set a goal date of November 30th to get all of your shopping done. That way you and your spouse will avoid the insane malls in December, Mister babache meaning that you can spend more time with family and friends during the holidays. It also means that you will be less likely to make impulse purchases, saving your family money.
Don't put yourself in debt
When you're shopping for Christmas gifts, tone down the number of gifts that you buy and the amount that you spend. Money issues can cause huge problems in a marriage and spending more than you can afford during Christmas can put a strain on your bank account and your relationship. Keep it simple. Not everyone on your Christmas list needs four or five gifts. For most people it really is the thought that counts. Getting friends and family one gift that you know they will love is often better than giving them several high priced gifts that they don't really need.
Only do what you both want to do
The holidays come with a long list of obligations: Christmas concerts, staff parties, Church teas and craft sales, family visits, etc. This year only do what you and your spouse both genuinely want to do. Losing one or two obligation events in December will give you more time to enjoy other things and will also stop any resentment between the two of you. If you know that your wife or husband absolutely hats going to your staff party, consider skipping it or going alone. And if there are several family gatherings, beg off from one or two. Allowing yourself to miss events that you are only going to out of a sense of obligation will lessen the holiday stress.
Schedule alone time
Between the shopping, parties and gatherings, make sure that you and your spouse schedule in some alone time. During the holidays a lot of the time you spend together will be task oriented. Make sure that you fit in some non-essential events, even if it's just dinner and a movie. Or do something Christmas related, but fun, like build a snowman with the kids or go ice skating. The key is to do something fun, so that you and your spouse can spend time together and de-stress.
Have a game plan
Make sure that when it comes to gift-giving, visiting family and work parties that you are both on the same page. If you also have children you want to make sure that everybody knows where they are supposed to be and when. Planning food, rides and clothing ahead of time can cut down on last minute scrambling and major fights.
Communicate
If you aren't happy with something, let your spouse know. The holidays can be such a busy and hectic time that people can forget to check in with one another to see how they're doing. Keeping the lines of communication open can eliminate most of the bickering and confusion that can take over the holidays.
Andy West is a freelance writer for MarriageMax.com. Marriage Fitness is an innovative step-by-step relationship-changing system that teaches you how to save your marriage. It is a more effective alternative to marriage counseling. They offer free marriage help to couples going through marriage problems.
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